[ you can't get hungover if you're still drunk. he is obviously using his head here, genji.
jesse's not making any real effort to move, falling against the other's shoulder like the dead weight he is. there were choices made, leading up to genji's arrival. poor choices, that were preceded by several other bad decisions.
he does, however, attempt to pull his hat back on. he can't leave without that. ]
[Clearly Jesse is playing some fourth dimensional chess of drinking here. Genji is just too closed minded to see it.
Problem being that Jesse is bigger than him. A lot bigger. He staggers under the weight of having to support his entire drunken self, hoping that he doesn't break his shoulder hauling him out of there.]
Come on you. It is time to sleep it off and have some breakfast.
[He starts to lead him towards the swinging doors, but its more like dragging. He has a small amount of money, he'll find a motel room with a tub so he can dump this disaster of a cowboy in there and hose him off until he doesn't smell of alcohol and bad decisions.]
[ genji is rewarded for his efforts, as it does manage to get him up off the stool. with a jingle of spurs, jesse stumbled for a moment as he attempted to get his feet back under him, a hand reaching out to grab the bar, just barely catching the edge. ]
Had breakfast.
[ it's slow progress to the door, but he was moving. ]
[Wow. That is one hell of a look from behind that helmet that McCree was getting. Not that he could see it but for anyone within a five mile radius it could be felt]
Yes, I'm going to blow your mind so much you will not even remember it.
No McCree. Come on. Outside before you vomit all over me.
[ if he could feel the intensity of that look, he certainly didn't show it. instead, he laughed like the drunken idiot he was, trying to slap the other on the back and nearly ending up on his face. ]
'Can bet I'd remember that... Thought about it enough.
[ a more sober man would hope that genji doesn't remember this conversation. ]
[ the stench of alcohol is surely very alluring, along with the broad, drunken smile. this is clearly not the end result of several bad decisions, along with a resurgence of complicated emotions that jesse is not completely prepared to deal with in a mature way. ]
he did manage to keep on his feet, albeit barely. you could practically hear the gears grinding as he tried to think it through, stomach churning from more than just the booze. he could. he could kiss him right now on that stupid mask, and...
[He half expected McCree to take him up on it and drunkenly fall on him. Not that this is much better.]
You have had more than enough. We are still leaving, this way.
[He grabs onto Jesse before he can stagger back to the bar, hauling him towards the door and out into the bright sunshine because it isn't even 10 am Jesse. Time to find a hotel and leave McCree in a pile while he pays for the room because wow is a metal ninja carrying a half drunk cowboy to the front desk going to look suspicious even at the shadiest of pay by the hour places.]
[ he muttered a curse at the harsh light, pulling his hat down to better shield his face. he was by no means steady, but he did manage to keep pace with genji as he went.
there is a vague thought that he'd left his bike parked around somewhere, not that he was in any state to be driving it. the keys were probably somewhere in one of his pockets, if they hadn't already been confiscated by the bartender.
at some point between when genji had left him and when he'd come back, he had managed to cross the small distance to an alley to purge his guts. it didn't make him feel any better, but at least that way, it wasn't going to end up on genji's shoes. ]
[Into the hotel with you. He detours into the bathroom, dumping McCree into the tub fully clothed. He can smell the alcohol and bad decisions through his mask and he is not going to deal with that all day. Turning the water on full blast and freezing he aims it right at McCree's face. Wakey wakey Jesse. ]
[ he threw a hand up to try to protect his face, not that it helped much. for being a hole in a wall, they definitely weren't lacking in water pressure; the layers and the armor did nothing against the icy bite of the spray, and he sputtered furiously, trying to scramble out of the tub. ]
[Of course now he's risking that he'll somehow smell like wet dog. He grabs Jesse's hat to put on the counter so that his hair can get nice and wet too. If he had one of those long scrubby brushes he would be sudsing him up as well.]
[ he is not making much headway in getting out of the tub, thanks to being heavily intoxicated and the awkward angle he was sitting in it. if nothing else, he looked like a wet dog now, his bangs drenched and clinging to his face.
... wet leather is definitely not the best smell, though. ]
Turn that damned thing off!
[ this is probably not the best thing for peacekeeper either, genji. come on. ]
[He finally relents, more for the state of McCree's arm rather then his gun. Wet prosthetics take forever to dry, it feels weird to get water in the joints, and he's not actually sure if Jesse's is even waterproof. He turns the water off, point proven and McCree making coherent sentences in out-loud words instead of drunken mumbling.]
I am the last person to be lecturing about self-control and good choices, but you make me look an amateur.
[He leans down to help McCree out of the tub, forgetting that being wet will also make him very slippery.]
[ the end of the water was followed by another stream of expletives, and the thoroughly waterlogged cowboy sank back against the porcelain with a grunt. even without the spray, his clothing was already soaked through, and he could feel the chill already taking hold. his arm was waterproof, thankfully, but it didn’t make the feeling any less uncomfortable, and his maintenance kit was still packed with his bike.
he should have been the adult. the mature solution would be to allow himself to be helped from the tub, dry off, and move on. in that moment, jesse didn’t want to be mature.
once he had a solid grip on genji’s forearm, he heaved back, hoping to yank the ninja right down with him. ]
[Genji is wearing armor and has three metal appendages, but the alloy that makes him light enough to double jump and do all his ninja flips, works against him here because he weighs far, far less than someone his size should. McCree's yank is more than enough to drag him down, losing his balance and crashing into the cowboy's chest with a loud thunk as metal armor met metal armor.
He curses loudly in Japanese and flails, trying to get up from the awkward position of having his legs on the edge of the tub and his upper half on McCree which isn't giving him leverage or any good handholds. ]
even if he didn't weigh as much a cyborg that size likely should, he wasn't light. especially when landing bodily on jesse's chest. it was a testament to the strength of his own armor that it didn't dent on the impact, but he'd definitely be having some bruises the next day. the sudden force was enough to knock the air from his lungs, and he wheezed in a breath or two as he tried to recover.
any effort he made to try and move only seemed to entangle them further, a sprawling mess of limbs and spurs, and how the hell did he end up with his leg there? ]
[He yells something in Japanese that certainly sounds angry, thwonking his palm against McCree's armored chest as if to add insult to injury.]
Stop moving! You are making it worse!
[He rolls to the side in order to get himself fully into the tub so that he can get situated to then get out of the tub. Which jams his elbow into McCree's side and probably his legs into place Jesse would rather they not be. But okay. He is in the tub now, and on top of Jesse. Time to fix this stupid mess.]
[ he didn't any idea what the words meant, but he got the gist. seemed pretty accurate, all things considered. jesse glowered at him as he thumped his chest, metal fingers sliding against the smooth tub surface as he made a futile attempt for leverage. ]
You're one to talk!
[ the elbow wasn't pleasant, but it wasn't half as alarming as the pressure of genji's knee against his (other) six shooter. it was just brushing up against the line between discomfort and pain, and he hissed as he moved again. ]
[But he stops moving for the moment, leaning his forehead against Jesse's shoulder and trying to think rationally. The way his head is swimming he feels like he might be getting drunk just from proximity. ]
You do smell less offensive.
[But his breath is still about 80 proof and a little nauseating. ]
[ he was grateful for the temporary reprieve, even if it didn't make him any lighter. the lack of movement did make it a little easier to focus, if nothing else. ]
That s'pposed to make this better?
[ he wasn't even close to sober, but the frigid water had made him slightly more coherent. at least enough to recognize how awkward this was. ]
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It is far too early for this. I am a buzzkill because I care. And usually I am equally as drunk, just not at nine in the morning.
[Time to get up McCree. He tries to get his shoulder under the cowboy's arm, gonna get out of here so he can sleep it off.]
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[ you can't get hungover if you're still drunk. he is obviously using his head here, genji.
jesse's not making any real effort to move, falling against the other's shoulder like the dead weight he is. there were choices made, leading up to genji's arrival. poor choices, that were preceded by several other bad decisions.
he does, however, attempt to pull his hat back on. he can't leave without that. ]
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Problem being that Jesse is bigger than him. A lot bigger. He staggers under the weight of having to support his entire drunken self, hoping that he doesn't break his shoulder hauling him out of there.]
Come on you. It is time to sleep it off and have some breakfast.
[He starts to lead him towards the swinging doors, but its more like dragging. He has a small amount of money, he'll find a motel room with a tub so he can dump this disaster of a cowboy in there and hose him off until he doesn't smell of alcohol and bad decisions.]
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Had breakfast.
[ it's slow progress to the door, but he was moving. ]
You gonna sleep with me?
[ ... take that as you will, genji. ]
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Yes, I'm going to blow your mind so much you will not even remember it.
No McCree. Come on. Outside before you vomit all over me.
[Ah. Romance.]
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'Can bet I'd remember that... Thought about it enough.
[ a more sober man would hope that genji doesn't remember this conversation. ]
Lead the way.
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Is this how it went? You stumbling over your feet and me dragging you to a motel that is likely crawling with roaches?
[If he doesn't acknowledge the fact that McCree just said he fantasizes about him, its like it never happened right?]
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Nah. Could always show you, if ya want.
[ the stench of alcohol is surely very alluring, along with the broad, drunken smile. this is clearly not the end result of several bad decisions, along with a resurgence of complicated emotions that jesse is not completely prepared to deal with in a mature way. ]
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[He lets go, stepping away and letting Jesse stand on his own. Or fall flat on his face.]
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he did manage to keep on his feet, albeit barely. you could practically hear the gears grinding as he tried to think it through, stomach churning from more than just the booze. he could. he could kiss him right now on that stupid mask, and...
and... ]
Gonna get another drink first.
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You have had more than enough. We are still leaving, this way.
[He grabs onto Jesse before he can stagger back to the bar, hauling him towards the door and out into the bright sunshine because it isn't even 10 am Jesse. Time to find a hotel and leave McCree in a pile while he pays for the room because wow is a metal ninja carrying a half drunk cowboy to the front desk going to look suspicious even at the shadiest of pay by the hour places.]
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there is a vague thought that he'd left his bike parked around somewhere, not that he was in any state to be driving it. the keys were probably somewhere in one of his pockets, if they hadn't already been confiscated by the bartender.
at some point between when genji had left him and when he'd come back, he had managed to cross the small distance to an alley to purge his guts. it didn't make him feel any better, but at least that way, it wasn't going to end up on genji's shoes. ]
Hell of a spot...
[ you're one to talk, jesse. ]
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[Into the hotel with you. He detours into the bathroom, dumping McCree into the tub fully clothed. He can smell the alcohol and bad decisions through his mask and he is not going to deal with that all day. Turning the water on full blast and freezing he aims it right at McCree's face. Wakey wakey Jesse. ]
The finest spa amenities.
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[ he threw a hand up to try to protect his face, not that it helped much. for being a hole in a wall, they definitely weren't lacking in water pressure; the layers and the armor did nothing against the icy bite of the spray, and he sputtered furiously, trying to scramble out of the tub. ]
The hell, Genji?!
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[Of course now he's risking that he'll somehow smell like wet dog. He grabs Jesse's hat to put on the counter so that his hair can get nice and wet too. If he had one of those long scrubby brushes he would be sudsing him up as well.]
How long have you been at the bar?
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... wet leather is definitely not the best smell, though. ]
Turn that damned thing off!
[ this is probably not the best thing for peacekeeper either, genji. come on. ]
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I am the last person to be lecturing about self-control and good choices, but you make me look an amateur.
[He leans down to help McCree out of the tub, forgetting that being wet will also make him very slippery.]
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he should have been the adult. the mature solution would be to allow himself to be helped from the tub, dry off, and move on. in that moment, jesse didn’t want to be mature.
once he had a solid grip on genji’s forearm, he heaved back, hoping to yank the ninja right down with him. ]
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He curses loudly in Japanese and flails, trying to get up from the awkward position of having his legs on the edge of the tub and his upper half on McCree which isn't giving him leverage or any good handholds. ]
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even if he didn't weigh as much a cyborg that size likely should, he wasn't light. especially when landing bodily on jesse's chest. it was a testament to the strength of his own armor that it didn't dent on the impact, but he'd definitely be having some bruises the next day. the sudden force was enough to knock the air from his lungs, and he wheezed in a breath or two as he tried to recover.
any effort he made to try and move only seemed to entangle them further, a sprawling mess of limbs and spurs, and how the hell did he end up with his leg there? ]
Shit-!
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Stop moving! You are making it worse!
[He rolls to the side in order to get himself fully into the tub so that he can get situated to then get out of the tub. Which jams his elbow into McCree's side and probably his legs into place Jesse would rather they not be. But okay. He is in the tub now, and on top of Jesse. Time to fix this stupid mess.]
You are honestly the worst.
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You're one to talk!
[ the elbow wasn't pleasant, but it wasn't half as alarming as the pressure of genji's knee against his (other) six shooter. it was just brushing up against the line between discomfort and pain, and he hissed as he moved again. ]
Just... hold up for a sec!
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[But he stops moving for the moment, leaning his forehead against Jesse's shoulder and trying to think rationally. The way his head is swimming he feels like he might be getting drunk just from proximity. ]
You do smell less offensive.
[But his breath is still about 80 proof and a little nauseating. ]
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That s'pposed to make this better?
[ he wasn't even close to sober, but the frigid water had made him slightly more coherent. at least enough to recognize how awkward this was. ]
You wanna get off me?
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[Now that he's stopped moving he's a little more aware of where all his limbs are and how close his knee is to McCree's ... Weapon.
He pulls back, leaning against the tiled wall and trying to figure out how to get up without jabbing him in tender places.]
Can you sit up? That will give us more room.
[And put him in Jesse's lap, but from there he might be able to scooch back and climb out of there.]
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